Rest here a moment, worker bee. You’re overworked and underpaid. So are millions of faceless drones that surround you. You are the backbone of our economy, the winners of bread. Perhaps one day it will not be this way, but this is the position you were born to. This is the path you have chosen. Silently, you toil away, having learned long ago that your situation is not bettered by complaining.
While you lay your weary head, a yarn to pass the time. Something to break the quietude brought on by the ennui of your day-to-day existence.
Here you sit reading articles during your lunch hour, afraid to leave your desk.
Remember five years ago when the banks stole all of your hard-earned money, lied to regulators and got off scot-free? Did we not all learn our lesson from that experience?
No, no we did not.
Read more: SEC STAFFER STEVEN SUSSWEIN CAUGHT IN ABSURD SEC CLAIM: GIFTING STOCKS ILLEGAL IN AMERICA?
Last year it was revealed that JP Morgan employees at the firm’s London headquarters went to great lengths to cover up the losses stemming from transactions of Bruno Iksil, The London Whale.
“Justice for the proletariat,” you shout!
Justice you shall have.
JPMorgan has been ordered to pay more than $920 million for its failure to provide proper oversight on traders to make sure they were properly valuing portfolios. Since the company messed with investors in the United States and in UK, the two countries will split the fine pretty much down the middle.
Gawker did the math and came up with the following, “The bank will have to pay just $920 million, or 0.03 percent of its current holdings. With total assets of $2.35 trillion, JPMorgan could pay the same fine every hour for three months, or every day for seven years, before their coffers would run dry.”
You should be well satisfied at this news.
Read more: DAMARIS COLHOUN, COLUMBIA JOURNALISM REVIEW WRITER, DEERE IN THE HEADLIGHTS
Run along now, noble bee. You have been granted nourishment for the body and soul enough for now on this lunchbreak.
Back to your Kia, your cubicle and your town home.
No, you may not leave early on Friday. You had a three-day weekend three weekends ago.
Back to work with you.
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