NEW WEB SERIES, F!CK YES, SAYS CONSENT IS SEXY
If you ever thought that consent was a mood-killer, think again. This new web series, F!ck Yes, tackles all sorts of consent issues and shows us how consent can be super sexy. Here are 5 things it teaches viewers that this author wishes she had been told when she was starting to have sex.
Consensual Sex advice #1: if he doesn’t have a condom, and you also do not have a condom, why can’t he go out and buy a condom? The few minutes it takes to just buy the thing you need does not make me want to have sex with you less, it makes me want to have sex with you more. You’re taking the time to make sex with me safe, and that’s fucking hot.
Consensual Sex advice #2: Being on your period doesn’t mean sex can’t happen. It also doesn’t mean sex has to happen. Use your words and talk about it. Maybe she doesn’t want to because it makes her feel gross, or maybe she wants to because she’s super horny anyway. Maybe he doesn’t want to because he’s not in the mood, or maybe he wants to because he’s just super horny too. Periods are a part of life for people with vaginas and they don’t have to affect whether you have sex or not. You have towels don’t you?
Consensual Sex advice #3: Laughing and talking during sex is good even on a web series. It brings both partners closer together. If someone laughs, it DOES NOT mean that they are laughing at anyone. Sex is objectively funny and lots of things that happen during sex are inherently hilarious, so let the laughter commence! PLUS, laughter makes for a deeper sense of intimacy when shared.
Consensual Sex advice #4: Dirty talk can be fun, but it also might make some people uncomfortable. There are ways, however, to engage in dirty talk without forcing anyone into an awkward sex corner. If you say “tell me where you want me to touch you,” and your partner doesn’t know what to say, you could say “what about here?” and pick a place to touch them. Keep doing this until they feel comfortable telling you what they want or moving your hand where they want it to go.
Consensual Sex advice #5: There are certain things that should be disclosed before having sex with someone for the first time. These things include: being a virgin or having a transmittable STI. Most every STI can be worked around, but the new partner should have all the information they need in order to be able to fully consent to sex with you. And if they freak out about herpes or HPV, neither of which are a big deal, then you probably don’t want to have sex with them anyway.