Michael Musto To Anthony Weiner: Drop Your Plans, Not Your Pants

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Michael Musto To Anthony Weiner Drop Your Plans, Not Your Pants

Anthony Weiner is about to drop his pants again. Christine Quinn probably won’t be sending Anthony Weiner her crotch shots anytime soon, but she definitely should be sending him a big bunch of flowers. As evidence of his sexting shtick kept surfacing last week, Weiner paved the way for a Quinn victory with every bulbous indiscretion and daringly dirty doing. In fact, the only shock left in this whole scandal is the fact that Weiner hasn’t dropped out of the mayoral race yet.

From the start, Weiner’s antics have been a comedy goldmine, mainly because even a professional gag writer couldn’t have come up with a more perfect surname for the subject of all this hooha. When we found out that one of his screen tags was Carlos Danger, that was even more of a sick riot. But it’s just not that funny anymore. Bawdy giggles turned into a sort of liberal compassion, which has segued into queasy distrust on the part of anyone hoping to salvage full respect for their leaders.

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At first, we comforted ourselves with chatter about how:

(A) At least Weiner didn’t actually have sex with anyone. As far as we know.

(B) This whole mess should be between he and his wife. Who really cares what he does with his fingers?

But then, even some lefties started murmuring, “Wait a minute. If this was a Republican, we’d care.” And as things got worse and the man proved completely untrustworthy, it was hard to make excuses for him anymore, no matter how delectable his mushroom head might seem to the starved masses.

Weiner is not just indiscreet, he’s a serial problem maker. He’s super dumb, not seeming to realize that someone running for office has to actually watch what they do. And most of all, he’s a liar. (A politician a liar? I know that sounds crazy, but I swear it!) He assured everyone he’d gotten it together, but he was actually still yanking it out and sending it to strangers. The man just can’t control himself, which is fine with me—I’m no puritan, and far from dainty myself– but it doesn’t bode well for someone angling for a big leadership position. Behavior like that could make you vulnerable to all sorts of blackmail and extortion plots — not to mention some amateur photo sessions that don’t do his privates justice at all!

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My guess is that Weiner will eventually wise up and pull out — sorry — and then poor Huma will finally pull away. She’s stood by her man through all this because apparently she’s power-mad like he is, and because the loyal-sheepdog routine worked for Hillary (whom Huma has long toiled for and learned from). But now that hubby’s hopes are shattered along with his credibility, she’ll surely take the baby and a settlement and run far, far away, to someplace without cell phones or high heels.

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Meanwhile, Weiner’s latest sextee, the improbably named Sydney Leathers, happens to have a publicist, who interestingly lists Sydney among her “reality” clients. I guess this whole scandal has come off so much like a real-life reality show that people keep waiting for the commercials. In any case, I might send Weiner, Huma, and even Sydney some lovely thank you bouquets of my own. As dispiriting as all this craziness has been, it definitely hasn’t been boring.

[Related Post: Weiner Spurts out 2nd Sexting Scandal]

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