Does the New York Times maintain a cozy and unethical relationship with Anthony Weiner? Readers may believe so. In Sunday’s profile of Anthony Weiner by the New York Times Magazine, reporter Jonathan Van Meeten failed to address the sexting scandal with Weiner, thereby entirely not addressing the 300lb gorilla in the room, and therefore rendering an entire New York Times magazine cover entirely moot.
New York City mayoral candidate Anthony Weiner has been embroiled in a sexting scandal with a 22 year old with a terrible back tattoo. If you can’t handle yourself around a 22 year old with a terrible back tattoo, how can you handle the biggest city in America? You can’t. You simply can’t. A 22 year old with a terrible back tattoo sloring her way to fame via sexting is sort of an amuse-bouche of political scandal; if you blow your load with this, how can we expect to trust you with a main course?
It seems that the New York Times Magazine was soft on Weiner. Hang on, I’ve got a few more of these:
- New York Times Magazine Fumbles Weiner
- Weiner rolled up in New York Times Magazine
- NYTM’s Balk-Of-Shame After Weiner
- Dick Joke #4
- Elusive Weiner gets away through reporter’s fingers
This isn’t the first time Anthony Weiner – a name, given the context, so steeped in irony it’s almost as if this were a living, breathing SNL sketch – has been getting his sext on. Just two years ago he could barely contain his penis to the point where he broadcast it to his entire Twitter following, causing him to give up his own senate seat.
2013 was supposed to be his comeback year, and despite even my own previously-held belief that another scandal simply wouldn’t matter, it appears that not only was he sexting 22 year old Sydney Leathers (that is her real name) but that he was also sending her pictures of his penis, which were obtained by the hilariously fuck-not-givingly internet tabloid The Dirty. How they obtained them is anyone’s guess. Methinks this Weiner has a leak in it somewhere.
The Clinton’s are reportedly mad at Weiner, which wouldn’t be the first time they’ve been mad at a stray weiner, amirite? (jokes! There’s so many dick jokes! This is a dream for a failed comedy writer! You have no idea!) There’s talks behind the scenes that the Clintons may just ask this Weiner to step aside because Anthony Weiner is making a mockery of the New York democratic party. Which is true. Nobody wants this Weiner anywhere near the… honestly, actually, it’s getting more and more difficult to come up with Weiner jokes. I’m gonna take a breather.
Alas, alack, alay, Weiner just couldn’t keep it in. And now his entire campaign hangs in the balance. But the question is, will Weiner give up? Everyone knows there’s nothing sadder than a Weiner that just gives up. But this is the second time this Weiner has gotten into trouble. If he gives up a second time, that may just be grounds to stop seeing this particular Weiner.
Weiner is a big whiner.