Gotta love racists; if anything, they’re an excellent source of comedy. Who doesn’t like a good old-fashioned, um, old-fashioned person? Their opinions are so old timey! It’s like they’re … what do the hipsters call it … vintage! Yes! It’s like their opinions are vintage. Très chic!
By that logic, the hippest radio DJ around is a guy named Mark Levin (sexy name!) who reaches 7.5 million people weekly (shudder!) with his syndicated radio show, roughly the same amount of listeners as Glenn Beck. For three hours a day, Mark spouts off on whatever is on his mind. This is usually the same ol’ flag-wavin’ “we’re the greatest country” / “damn the liberals” / “Reagan makes me come” rhetoric that we’ve found again and again with the far right.
But he went a little further the other day, verging on full-on racism, when he said that Oprah doesn’t know anything about racism. On the contrary, Oprah Winfrey — a black woman hailing from Chicago’s South Side in the 1960s who transformed herself into a self-made empire-building media mogul billionaire — is perhaps one of the single most respected authorities on race relations that America has ever had.
“Oprah Winfrey has no idea what it’s like to live in a country that really is brutally racist … I’m not talking about older people who lived through segregation and those other horrible events, because obviously they do.”
In the description of the show — which you can listen to over on his website — it states: “Mark talks about Oprah Winfrey’s comments saying that America is a racist country and that’s why they can’t accept President Obama as President. Mark takes offense to this and says that we are the greatest nation country in the world and we help out all religions and ethnicities across the globe when they are in trouble, and that we are not racist.”
Basically, Mark Levin is a grown-up Cartman from “South Park.” He’s a guy that gets a kick from going around and shitting on things.
Here’s a list of the names he calls politicians, names that he’s been saying for years, that never change, because he says them in the same way Larry the Cable Guy says his “GIT R DUN” catchphrase:
Krispy Kreme Christie (Chris Christie)
Mayor Bloomturd (New York Mayor Michael Bloomberg)
Capone/Creepy Ballerina (Rahm Emanuel)
Al Not-So-Sharpton (Al Sharpton)
Chucky Schmucky Schumer (Chuck Schumer)
Stretch Pelosi (Nancy Pelosi)
Plugs/Joe Biteme (Vice President Joe Biden)
Chris “I’ll have another drink” Matthews
“Little” Dick Durbin
Mike Huckaphony (Mike Huckabee)
The Impeached Pervert/BJ Bill Jefferson Clinton (Bill Clinton)
Rachel Mad-Cow (Rachel Maddow)
Her Thighness (Hillary Clinton)
Diane Frankenfeinstein (Diane Feinstein)
Kathleen Supercilious (Kathleen Sebelius)
The New York Slimes (New York Times)
The Washington Compost (Washington Post)
Department of No Growth
Department of No Energy
No Growth Flatearthers (radical environmentalists)
Drones (Democrats who never disagree with the party line)
It may be easy to get outraged at Mark Levin, but he’s built his career on outrage. He’s a schoolyard bully with a persecution complex, the kind of sad little man that not only lobs bombs but is prepared to lie to you to your face just to convince himself he’s right.