Yale Study: Texas Fracking Causes Higher Rates of Lone Star STDs

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Yale Study: Texas Fracking Causes Higher Rates of Lone Star STDs

RIDICULOUS YALE STUDY SAYS TEXAS FRACKING CAUSES HIGHER RATES OF STDS

So this news comes from a study at Yale University.  You know, one of them Northeast elitist schools?  But despite that, you might just want to read on a bit.  Because this is strange news, indeed.  Yale’s School of Public Health published their research and it has made waves.  To say the least.  Pro frackers and anti frackers have, admittedly, lined up the way you’d expect.  So what’s this about?  Yale researchers made a (maybe?) startling discovery.  They found that in Texas counties with fracking, there was 10-15% higher rates of STDs.  Weird, right?  The Lone Star has always been a little different.  But Yale, this is waaaay different.

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20 OTHER FRACKING STATES HAVE NO EXTRA STD PROBLEMS, DON’T MESS WITH TEXAS

So have these numbers proven true in other states with fracking?  Well, not really.  Companies do fracking in 21 US states right now.  The Yale study also looked at two others, Colorado and North Dakota.  But they found no correlation.  Ok, this is getting weirder.  I personally think fracking is incredibly dangerous.  But this research announcement seems fracking fucked to me.  So sure, they found that rates of Chlamydia and Gonorrhea were higher in Texas counties with fracking.  Yes, that’s significant.  But is there a connection?  Off the top of my head I can think of one alternative to Yale’s findings.  You know, that fracking workers use more sex workers down there and don’t wear condoms.  You know, like in the days of the Gold Rush?

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MAYBE YALE STUDY SHOULD LOOK AT LONE STAR FRACKING WORKERS SEEING PROSTITUTES?

So the other three STDs that are the most common in the US are HPV, Syphilis and Herpes.  But those rates aren’t higher.  Maybe that means the Yale study is fracking bunk.  Maybe not.  But at a first glance, this study is just fracking fucked.  Or Fucking fracked.  But when you look at it a little, shall I say, deeper, it just gets worse.  Fracking sucks.  It’s dirty.  It pollutes.  But it also causes earthquakes where they never, ever happen.  Oh, and we don’t know how dangerous fracking chemicals really are.  But really Yale, increased STDs?  Better get your frack on at a different cathouse.  That’s my recommendation.

Ah, Bulldogs.

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