Dick Pic Sender Sues Reporter for Reporting Dick Pick Sending

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Dick Pic Sender Sues Reporter for Reporting Dick Pick SendingFOX NEWS HOST SUES REPORTER FOR…. COLLABORATED REPORTING

If you haven’t heard, Fox News host Eric Bolling was himself in the news recently because he “sent an unsolicited photo of male genitalia via text message to at least two colleagues at Fox Business and one colleague at Fox News.”  For some reason Bolling’s being “outed” for his alleged digital “outing” has made him a wee bit upset.  Actually he’s so angry he is suing the aforementioned reporter Huffington Post freelancer Yashar Ali for $50 million.  Crazy, right?

“INNOCENT” BOLLING USED PHONE KNOWN AS HIS FOR WORK, AND NOW FOR DICK PIC SENDING

Outsiders aren’t sure how much traction this lawsuit will have, especially given that Ali’s reporting has collaborated by twelve sources, also known as 12 different people.  Evidently the female colleagues who allegedly received the dick pics knew that Eric Bolling was the sender as he used a number that was familiar “from previous work-related and informal interactions.”  Of the twelve confirming sources, four saw the dick pics and eight others were witness associates who discussed the pics with the recipients.  That’s a lot of dick pic to go around!  Anthony Wiener was not asked to comment on this story.

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FOX NEWS SUSPENDS “INNOCENT” BOLLING, CONTINUES NORMALIZING WHITE SUPREMACISTS, NAZIS (GORKA)

Bolling has since been formally suspended from Fox News, and is apparently targeting Ali personally rather than the Huffington Post for the publication of the story.

A New York State Supreme Court filing unearthed by Business Insider found that Ali has been issued a summons reading, “The nature of this action is for damages and injunctive relief based on defamation arising from the defendant’s efforts to injure the plaintiff’s reputation through the intentional and/or highly reckless publication of actionable false and misleading statements about the plaintiff’s conduct and character.”

BOLLING HIRES TRUMP FIRM, MUST BE INNOCENT

Curiously, Bolling has secured the services of Kasowitz Benson Torres LLP, the same law firm defending Donald Trump amid multiple federal investigations into the president’s rumored ties to Russian operatives.

The report couldn’t have come at a worse time for Bolling. Numerous claims of massive, widespread sexual and racial harassment at the network in the past year have piled up to the point where it might as well be one of their core business functions (alongside whispering evil thoughts into Trump’s brain). Current and former employees have filed multiple lawsuits, the network is facing a federal probe, and key Fox News players including the late Roger Ailes, network star Bill O’Reilly and pundit Bob Beckel have all resigned or been fired amid harassment allegations.

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EXPERTS SAY LAWSUIT STUPID, DICK PIC SENDERS COULD FACE MORE EXPOSURE ON DISCOVERY

But as multiple writers noted on Twitter, suing over a dick pic you allegedly sent might be among the least legally advisable things you could do, as the defense could potentially dig up lots of embarrassing material in discovery.

Perhaps Bolling has never heard of the Streisand effect, something virtually every person who has spent time online or worked in the media knows about. It’s that little principle whereby trying to suppress a piece of information already available online results in said information blowing up everywhere.

This is particularly true of things like dick pics or alleged dick pics, which Bolling could probably ask his colleague Geraldo Rivera about. For example, one piece of advice Rivera might have would be to tweet less.

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Ali, who is a reporter, also likely does not have $50 million.

COULD BE MORE PAINFUL THAN FRANKS AND BEANS

Just a nice little reminder that whenever you allegedly text a photo of your penis to someone, you can’t ever put that particular boner back behind the zipper. And if you allegedly send an unsolicited photo of your penis to colleagues, boy, could you find yourself in a real pickle.

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