REPUBLICAN GALA FEATURES OUTRAGE YOU CAN BUY VIBRATORS AT CVS STORES ANYWHERE
So over the weekend on Saturday the Republicans hosts yet another of their New York Young Republicans Club gala. As you can imagine, these days any major Republican event is going to be filled with a variety of panting histrionics and misdirected, incoherent morality projection. This is what you need to be afraid of! This is our nation’s problem! And this one, too! Frankly, there are too many of them to list. But one standout was how they suddenly realized that CVS, the major pharmacy chain here in the United States, sells vibrators. News flash! And I’m not sure exactly what it says about the Republican Party these days, but the realization has made them flip out.
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IT’S A DEEP DIVE TO SUDDENLY “REALIZE” VIBRATORS ARE EASY TO BUY ALMOST ANYWHERE
And let’s be clear, we’re talking about Tucker Carlson and Marjorie Taylor Greene, here. They are having a contrived ole’ flip out over CVS selling a product called the “Buzzy Butt” vibrating butt plug. Sure, if we were still in the 1980’s or even 1990’s, the idea that you could walk into a major retail store and buy a vibrating butt plug would have Prurients up in arms everywhere. That’s the kind of thing that someone should only be able to find in an adult store, slinking in and out hoping no one they knew saw them. Sex is naughty! And vibrators? Shudder. Except these days, you’ve already been able to buy such products in major retail stores for years.
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REPUBLICANS EVEN TRIED TO COMPARE MORALITY TO BUYING VIBRATORS TO CIGARETTES
Greene said, “By the way, you can pick up a butt plug or a dildo at Target and CVS nowadays. I don’t even know how we got here… This is the state that we’re living in right now.” Oh, ok. This is a testament to how bad things are in the US today, folks. People (but especially women) can make these choices in a regular U.S. store and that’s terrible! Something must be done! When they went on to list how easy it was to affordably buy several vibrators in New York as a bad thing, Tucker Carlsen replied, “But it’s immoral to sell Marlboros.”
Sorry, Tucker, but it’s been years since a movie depicted the Marlboro Man stemming the rose. Don’t you remember? We’ll just have to wait and see if the Republican faithful choke on this rage bait, too, and declare a WAR ON VIBRATORS!