If you’re not following Sir Patrick Stewart’s shenanigans, you should be. He’s totally winning at this Internet thing.
I mean, a lesson to us all, when you take selfies, try to take them with your bestie, Sir Ian McKellen. Here’s them being all awesome during the Super Bowl.
Also, if want to announce your marriage to the particularly attractive Sunny Ozell, try doing it from a pit of colorful balls. Because that’s adorable.
P-Stew, as he likes to be called (probably not, though), really hit it out of the park this week when The Guardian mistakenly outed Sir Patrick — mistakenly outed him or outed him by mistake?
Anyway, the star of “X-Men,” “Star Trek: The Next Generation,” and some plays, I think, sent a very lovely congratulatory note to actress Ellen Page after she came out publicly at some la-tee-dah Human Rights Campaign dinner. All kidding aside, she gave a very heartfelt speech.
Sir Patrick responded with this kind and supportive tweet, because that’s what 73-year-old knights do. They tweet messages of love and encouragement.
Nice, right? Well, Jane Czyzselska over there at The Guardian somehow forgot how to use Google, or that she could ask, you know, anyone around her at the time, whether or not this also meant that Stewart was gay. Because gay people can only congratulate other gay people when it comes to being gay.
Sir Patrick responded with the following tweet.
Then someone on Twitter suggested that if he didn’t want to be called a gay, then he shouldn’t be around the gays, like that no good and certainly bad influence Sir Ian McKellen. Because where there’s smoke, someone’s bound to be flaming, right? Sir Patrick responded to that with another tweet.
And, according to Sir Patrick, being gay is better than the alternative.
It seems that the reports of Sir Patrick’s gayness were wildly exaggerated.
The Guardian later issued the following correction:
“This article was amended on 17 February 2014. The third paragraph originally said ‘Some gay people, such as Sir Patrick Stewart, think Page’s coming out speech is newsworthy’. This should have read ‘Some people, such as Sir Patrick Stewart, think Page’s coming out speech is newsworthy.'”
Yawn. I guess, Guardian. But I will give you this: when you tried to give us a fake gay, you really gave us a good one.
Sir Patrick, continue winning at the Internet. Also, let’s have brunch. You’d totally love me. Bring Ian.