Man Discovers Packaging Dog Dung Wards Off Thieves

https://www.theblot.com/packaging-dog-dung-wards-off-thieves-7766540

 Man Discovers Packaging Dog Dung Wards Off Thieves

GREAT DANES CAN POOP A LOT

A normal Great Dane will have approximately two to four bowel movements a day.  Surprisingly, these dogs do not eat a lot, only two to three cups of dry food per meal.  They are remarkably gentle and also shockingly aggressive. Never approach these dogs under the assumption that they are friendly like Scooby Doo. Great Danes are also big.  Their poop is even bigger. They can poop a lot. They are prime poo package producers, that’s a lot of dog dung!

POOP IN A BOX

And if you put all that poop in a box, it can get stinky.  And that’s exactly what Mike Zaremba, of Riverside, Los Angeles, did in order to confront a thief who was stealing from him in his neighborhood.  Desperate times call for desperate measures, of poo.  Well, a poo package, anyway.

DOG PARTY POO PACKAGE, IN A BOX

Zaremba had several packages stolen from outside the front door of his home in Riverside.  He was fed up, so he and his friend came up with a plan.  A dirty, stinky plan.  He waited for a family party, and collected dog dung left by nine dogs at the party.  He put all the poo in a neat little poo package and left it on his porch.

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WAITED FOR THE THIEF TO STEAL THE POOP

He set up video surveillance and patiently waited.  A man identified as thirty-nine-year-old Daniel Aldama, cycled towards the package on his bike.  He may have been smelling fine before stealing the package, but definitely not later on. Authorities used a tracking device in the poo package to find the alleged thief and took him into custody.

CRAPPY TRICKS TO CATCH POO THIEVES

Zaremba is not the only one up to crappy tricks to catch a thief.  Cory Hovanec of Spokane, Washington, packaged soupy, messy dog dung.  Andrea Hutzler of Washington, D.C. did the same with her Great Danes poo: she put a package out on her porch.  Another man created an exploding box of poo.  These packages were stolen and the thieves were too ashamed to come back. Perhaps, they just didn’t want to find out what was coming next.  What comes after number two, anyway?  Something worse than a poo package!

DOG DUNG DOES IT FOR YOU!

Hopefully these thieves and all future package thieves have learned not to keep stealing from the same people because eventually they will get pooed on.  If you are looking for the ultimate gag gift or are seeking revenge and don’t have access to a dog or your own poo, look no further, there is a company called Poopsenders.com that does the work for you.

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