Ah. Orgasms, that’s where I derive most of life’s pleasures from. Don’t you agree? However you achieve them, the feel amazing, right? As I get older, I find myself wanting more and more of them. So last month I decided to try a little experiment and have at least one orgasm every day for 40 days. Not really spontaneous, but hopefully erotic, educational, and full of pleasure.
THE AFTERMATH- MY CLITORIS HAS BEEN THROUGH IT ALL
Having now come out the other side of my enforced daily pleasure, this is what I learnt about love, the libido, women, sexuality and giant vibrators that look like a big purple rabbit. At the tender age of 45, I discovered I need foreplay with myself! For real, I had to recalibrate the expectations I have of my own clitoris. But then I wondered, what does foreplay with me even look like? Sweet nothings in my own ear? Fantasies?
Midway through my “challenge” I learnt that foreplay must be an inside job. It doesn’t live and die on marathon foot rubs by George Clooney or picturing scantily clad young bucks with oiled-up abs. All pretty pictures, absolutely, but I realized the most titillating thing for me was permission. When I allowed myself to relax and turn off the crap-o-meter, breathing slowed down, thoughts followed suit and then and only then was George welcome to show up for the foot massage.
Twelve days in and my libido went limp. Seeking out pleasure felt like a chore. All I could think of was must I have another orgasm?! I’ve had enough already. In my pursuit of pleasure I often forgot one thing to relax. At night, desperate for sleep, thoughts of “have” plagued me … I’m tired but, I have to get my orgasm. There’s no pussy footing around the fact; the 21st Century has taken our urges hostage and none of us seem to put up much of a fight. We need to create time for intimacy and alter our mindsets so we aren’t so vulnerable to distractions and excuses like “I’ll just watch another hour of reality TV”.
ORGASMS ARE LIKE SOUP, THEY ARE FOR EVERYONE, JUST NOT EVERYDAY
I thought other women would rejoice in this challenge and rush home eager to kick off their own journeys. But dare I say, it was different strokes for different folks. Shock and support jostled for space with awe and a very fat white elephant in the room. After revealing the source of my new “glow” to a bunch of 40-something female colleagues, smiles froze over and quinoa suddenly seemed more interesting than my climaxing. These Women out here, don’t know a good thing when they see it. Try the 40 orgasams in 40 day challenge.