I mean, why fight when you can just watch 12 episodes of “The Simpsons” back-to-back instead?
In a new, makes-sense-to-me report, University of Buffalo researchers have concluded that couples who essentially smoke pot together are far less likely to engage in domestic violence.
Seriously.
This from a university study of the first nine years of marriages of 634 very hip, very cool couples we should all be friends with, apparently. The study was released this month in the journal “Psychology of Addictive Behavior,” known in academia as the Vanity Fair of journals, probably.
The study was supported by a grant from the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism and lead by Kenneth Leonard of the Research Institute of Addictions. According to Leonard, “these findings suggest that marijuana use is predictive of lower levels of aggression towards one’s partner in the following year.” He adds, “As in other survey studies of marijuana and partner violence, our study examines patterns of marijuana use and the occurrence of violence within a year period. It does not examine whether using marijuana on a given day reduces the likelihood of violence at that time.” My theory? Couples are too busy putting peanut butter on Oreos to really get angry with one another.
Specifically, the study found that:
- More frequent marijuana use by husbands and wives, defined as two to three times per month or more often, was followed by less-frequent intimate partner violence (IPV) perpetration by husbands.
- Husbands’ marijuana use also predicted less frequent IPV perpetration by wives.
- Couples in which both spouses used marijuana frequently reported the least frequent IPV perpetration.
- Giving couples access to YouTube and adorable cat videos further decreases IPV rates.
OK, I made up that last one.
The study comes out when marijuana use in America is at a bit of a crossroads. Critics of marijuana use are finding their arsenal of arguments against its use is dwindling rapidly. Proponents of the use of the drug can point to myriad things that tout the drug’s benefits, from everything to possibly halting the spread of HIV and AIDS to slowing the progression of Alzheimer’s disease.
Crime and violence-wise, remember when all the pot naysayers thought that crime rates would go through the roof in Colorado once the state legalized marijuana there? They were left disappointed, with crimes rates falling, in some cases, rather dramatically, across all categories. All this while the government is taking small but crucial steps to rethink the oft-critized “war on drugs” overall. Beyond that, the government has agreed to grow more pot to meet the demand of researchers like those at the University of Buffalo who wish to clear the air, so to speak, on marijuana use, bumping up the crop from 21 to 650 kilograms this year alone.
But when it comes to pot and the decrease of violence in domestic relationships, seriously, why be mean to each other when you can just buy some Cool Ranch Doritos and watch “Romy and Michele’s High School Reunion?”
Marital marijuana? Makes sense to me.
Brock Thompson is a contributing journalist for TheBlot Magazine.
