RUNNER GIVES MARATHON SPECTATORS A WELL PACKAGED FINISH
This is one for the record books. In what was a slightly more than the usual drama at the Košice Peace Marathon in Slovakia, the gathered crowd at the finish line got a different picture-perfect finish. One of the runners, Jozef Urban, didn’t seem to realize that his penis as well as his testicles slipped out and down one side of his running shorts as he approached and crossed the race’s finale. As one of Europe’s oldest marathon length races, officials are fairly certain it hasn’t happened before to a marathon man.
NO ONE HAD TIME TO GIVE RUNNER A HEADS UP FOR HEADS OUT
The extra bits of drama made themselves known to all in what can only be described as a package deal at the finish line. As the marathon man appears for the final leg (legs) of his race, his manly bits literally flopped into view and continued to do the full jangle with every remaining stride. Decibel tests aren’t available to truly know if onlookers’ cheers were for his finish, his package or his unfinished package at the finish. It’s also unknown if Josef Urban was even aware of his flopping finish, though improving his finish time by 27 seconds is no flop in itself.
BETTER THAN A HOT DOG FLOPPING DOWN A HALLWAY, AND A BETTER FINISH TO BOOT. FRANKS AND BEANS PERFECT FOR ANY MEAL
It was towards the final hundred metres that Jozef Urban really set pace with his franks and beans, which while earning him an impressive time, also meant that his penis waggled more thoroughly. His testicles too. Indeed, at one point Jozef ran with such energy that it looked as though his private parts may separate themselves entirely from his groin. Thankfully, they held fast.
The crowd, like Jozef, didn’t seem bothered. They cheered him raucously on, waving and shouting for the final push. You can see a few astonished expressions, a handful of laughs, but mainly, people celebrated a fine 26 miles, balls and all. For me, I went for some franks and beans.