130 LAS VEGAS ELEMENTARY SCHOOL KIDS HIT WITH “ARMAGEDDON” PROJECTILE VOMITING
Parents are still wondering what the hell happened a few days after a bug hit a Las Vegas Elementary school like a tidal wave, causing an outbreak with 130 students making a splash with projectile vomiting. If that doesn’t sound horrific, I don’t know what constitutes. A mother of one of the affected students told media, “A teacher said it was like Armageddon. Our daughter said there were trach cans lined up and kids just throwing up everywhere.” I can only imagine! That student’s father said his daughter’s teacher called the incident, “the apocalypse.”
ONLY THE KIDS WHO ATE SCHOOL CAFETERIA FOOD SUFFERED HORRIBLE PROJECTILE VOMITING
Another parent told media that her daughter seemed fine when she got home, but the projectile vomiting hit her later in the evening, with about 6 rounds of late night praying to the porcelain god. But 130 kids with such a powerful malady is no coincidence. They clearly were all exposed to the same thing, and it was devastating. But parents still have no word from the school district as to what happened. In fact, the parents say they’ve had no word at all! So far, the families of affected students are safely assuming that their kids all ate contaminated cafeteria food.
SCHOOL OFFICIALS WON’T RESPOND EXPLAINING CAUSE OF MASS PROJECTILE VOMITING APOCALYPSE
And their logic appears to be sound. All of the kids who had projectile vomiting ate food in the school cafeteria. And all of the kids who didn’t had no symptoms, avoiding the lineup of garbage cans to barf into outside the school’s office. But parents of kids who were sick are getting frustrated, as they have no updates from school officials telling them how to help their sick kids. A spokesperson for the Southern Nevada Health District has said that they are investigating the mass projectile vomiting and will provide more information once they have lab confirmation. One parent replied on TikTok, saying, “If I ever needed a reason to continue homeschooling, this is it.”