Cheaters Cheat Because They Suck at Sex…

https://www.theblot.com/cheaters-cheat-because-they-suck-at-sex-772572

Cheaters Cheat Because They Suck at Sex...

Cheaters cheat because of bad sex, the latest research shows. Regardless of all the reasons and excuses you’ve heard, cheaters cheat for one reason. Because their sex sucks. Cheaters are not making the cut in the bedroom, and the best explanation for the lack of motion in their ocean is because they are bumping an ugly, when in fact, they are either just lazy, handicapped, stressed, narcissistic, or really terrible in bed. And I’m not just making this up. Research backs me on this one, as it suggests that men are prone to cheating regardless of whether it is them, or their partner, that sucks in bed.

Surveys suggest that over 50 percent of committed cheaters, consider cheating, because they feel neglected, and believe that faithful sex sucks. The kicker is, most do not even try to improve on the bad sex. They just point out its suckiness; tell their partner they suck, and then move onto another sucky affair.

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According to 3,000 participants in a independent British poll by the extramarital dating site, lovinglinks.co.uk, the majority of partners who are dissatisfied with their sex, blame their marriage. Approximately 80 percent feel that the ball and chain on their finger is the primary reason for scheduled sex, repeated missionary position, and waking up with decent breath, unmatted hair, and their underwear folded neatly in a drawer, rather then wrapped around some slobbering fools head.

The biggest reason why they thought the sex had gone downhill was boredom. They also suggested that their partner had let themselves go, had become more of a friend than a lover, and they had run out of exciting places from which to do the deed. Thirty-three percent claimed their partner was not even attractive anymore, and a full 80 percent admitted they were occasionally too busy, too tired, and that it wasn’t uncommon for them to play dead in order to get out of sex entirely.

However, don’t think that these Romeo and Juliette’s weren’t willing to take some action. In fact, they reported trying such surefire tactics as reminding their partner regularly about the non-existent sex, and blaming them for their lack of libido. The real go-getter’s went shopping around bars and extramarital websites to find themselves a local fling. Out of the 25 percent who took action, 14 percent had found themselves in a full-time affair.

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Do you think that a new pair of shoes can make a limp dancer more spry? Well, two-thirds of these cheaters raved about their cheating sex, stating that it was amazing. None-the-less, two-thirds of the two-thirds still believed that their committed relationship could be salvaged if their partner would just put in more effort. In case you missed the last couple paragraphs, over 50 percent of cheaters openly admitted to withholding sex for reasons varying from being too busy, to sleeping; and three-quarters still believed it was up to their partner to improve things.

We can gather from these suggestions, that improved sex from a cheaters point of view, is less exertion, more oral, and more bread and potatoes for them, and less for their out of shape partner. What’s really going on here? Well, we know that they are not having sex as often as they once did, and they consider their partner to be unattractive. However, previous studies suggest that the majority of flings happen with a partner who is not any better looking than the original.

So, why are cheaters so mean to their partner?

It is just easier to fail in the sack, when you don’t have to face that person again. In fact, the mere idea of taking a risk is one of natures most potent aphrodisiacs. When a tyrannosaurus is barreling down your path, and you’ve got but one chance to deliver your seed, biology will make sure it gets done. So, beyond the danger of getting run over by a train, risky sex (a.k.a cheating) is a solid way to cure a man’s most embarrassing disorder, a limp biscuit; which is a kinder way of stating the obvious–his sex sucks.

Not all cheaters are handicapped. Some are just too afraid to make a request for what they really want in bed. So, instead of face a possible, no, maybe, or I’ll think about it; they seek out a stand-in to make their dream come true. Narcissistic lovers are also typically cheaters. They are self centered, entitled to this behavior, and while they may not respect you enough to throw you a decent bang; they have an overabundance of it for themselves, and know it’s entirely your fault.

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Research also suspects that cheating is a product of chronic stress. The kind of stress that comes with being chronically bad in bed. Think of it as the bodies desire to propagate the species one last time before their final curtain falls. Or in this case, to sleep with as many bodies as possible, before the word gets out that they suck in the sack. These fools just need to grow up, read a few Cosmo mags, take a few Geritol pills, and learn the art of squeezing their sex organs, so they can last longer than a Viagra commercial.

 

Eric J. Leech writes at Urbasm on many manly things, including gear, gadgets, style and dating.

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