At just weeks away from my 90th birthday, for health reasons, I’ve had to stop watching the evening news. It isn’t because of doctor’s orders, but I must switch off the TV because all the pseudo-medical commercials are getting more and more sickening.
The network bean-counting geeks who constantly play with their demographics and other extremities have decided that most TV evening news watchers are between age 55 and deceased. Thus, for every five on-air minutes of actual real-life happenings, there must be at least five minutes of miraculous medical messages, many aimed at senior citizens who can be conned into buying the useless stuff.
Among other benefits, the products (called “snake oil” by old-time peddlers) will erase wrinkles, regrow head hair, erase body hair, enhance sex lives, reduce back pain, relieve constipation, dam-up diarrhea and take off blubber. They’re absolutely guaranteed, as pitched by sincere on-air actors portraying real people to cure all devastating ailments.
The pitched products will miraculously restore the health of every TV addict, including those of us who are not quite at death’s door. Further, the ad geeks can’t be too sure that their messages are fully absorbed into our enfeebled brains. Therefore, as a selfless public service, they repeat the same ads endless times a day for weeks, months and years.
Actually, their real motive is the old trick of basic brainwashing. They know that with enough repeats laundering their brains, TV addicts will march out like mindless undead and buy the products. Nazi and Soviet torturers couldn’t have been more efficient in getting the job done.
Is TV brainwashing effective on TV addicts still in their prime years? Younger Americans are quite bright and can recite in great detail the latest scandal regarding Justin Bieber or explain the current Kardashian soap opera.
Of course, most cannot name a single member of the Supreme Court nor the capital city of Maine. Attention spans are ever decreasing because of the ever-increasing tiny electronic gear now glued to young ears and eyes. Does that indicate the end of their watching endless TV commercials on big-screen boob tubes as they once did from the comfort of their couches?
Hell, no! The flood of sickening ads now follows them everywhere. They’re still bombarded with endless commercials as they walk, drive, text and sext into their miniature boob tubes.
Ted Sherman is a contributing journalist for TheBlot Magazine. He will turn 90 on Aug. 8. He’s a U.S. Navy vet who served in World War II and the Korean War, and after a lifetime of writing for other people, he’s now sharing his opinions with the world at large for various publications and on his blog 90 Is The New Black. It’s a daily rant on current news, sports, health, travel, careers, entertainment, sports, relationships and, of course, problems of advanced age.