AGGRESSIVE CHICKEN TERRORIZES LOUISIANA BANK CUSTOMERS, BUT IT’S ON THE LAMB
So the pandemic situation is hard on all of our public service people on the front line. I can’t even imagine what it’s like to be a nurse, fireman or a cop. But it must be a surreal job as a cop, to have to go hunting for an aggressive chicken during the Coronavirus Lockdown. And yes, this is real. Police in Walker, Louisiana are on the hunt for an aggressive chicken. But it seems to be on the lamb. Yes, really. A chicken has been chasing people at a local bank when they go to use the ATM.
POLICE ON THE HUNT, BUT PUBLIC WILL NOW HELP THEM LOCATE THE RED-HEADED FIEND
But there’s more, of course. This aggressive chicken then tries to follow people into their cars, too! So you might be thinking the same thing I am. This chicken clearly hasn’t heard that there is a beef shortage at Wendy’s. Nor that Wendy’s is trying to sell more chicken in the interim. If he did, he might run around like a…. well, you get the idea. But local authorities did note that their suspect is ignoring social distancing rules. They describe the suspect as “reddish-tan” and he’s about a foot and a half tall. Maybe 6-8 pounds? You get the idea. A dangerous, aggressive chicken.
AGGRESSIVE CHICKEN FLEW THE COOP BEFORE POLICE ARRIVED AT THE SCENE, GOVERNOR NOT HAPPY
So last week, officers responded to a call reporting the foul harassment. But they reported that he “apparently anticipated the imminent arrival of law enforcement and fled on foot from the scene.” I’d say he hoofed it, but…. Police have asked the public for help in locating the little fiend. But they also warned not to approach it. It’s not armed. But it might be dangerous. The aggressive chicken is “wanted on charges of assault, attempted battery, attempted burglary, terrorizing and ignoring an order of the Governor.” I’d just say he’s plucky. Aggressive chicken, indeed.