This is about five very special women, all ladies nearly every man would hop on a plane to an exotic place with, no questions asked if an invitation was put forward.
Now, of course, this is total fantasy, but with a sexy twist. It’s like the “Who would you do?” game but with a vacation thrown in to make the fantasy scenario a bit spicier and more interesting. And more fantastic, in the very best sense.
Yes, it’s obviously a fantasy, but not just a straightaway meat market list of the sexiest or best butt (that post comes Tuesday, by the way). If one of these five mind-blowing-ly sexy ladies asked pretty much any living man if they would like to go on a trip together, there would be no saying, well, “No.”
I don’t know about you, but I’m ready to run away with these ladies … and I’m looking directly at you, Ms. Hayek …
1. Salma Hayek
I mean, what can I say about this Mexican-born dark beauty? Just try not to stare for too long. If these wet, bikini pictures could be repeated, say in Puerto Rico or Jamaica, an invitation would be impossible to resist. Damn, Salma. Que linda!
2. April Rose
This model and all-around beauty is simply a stunner. With her, I would say a mountain ski trip to Tahoe to snuggle would nicely fit the bill. I mean, what else can I say? Just take a look and enjoy. Trust me, it’ll be enough to keep warm through the winter (since, in all likelihood, you won’t be in Tahoe with her anytime soon. Or ever.)
3. Jessica Biel
Every guy’s favorite “7th Heaven” character — really the only reason to ever have watched that schmaltz-fest — has grown into a beautiful, incredibly sexy woman before America’s eyes. Honestly, this girl is so fine it’s distracting to watch movies she is in because the story becomes secondary and hard to follow when you get enveloped by her looks. Oh, well, getting to stare at her for more than an hour is well worth the $12 or more ticket price. And it’s not like the story of the film is important anyway; you won’t be watching anyone else on screen. Honestly, I don’t think any terrestrial trip would be enough. Mrs. Timberlake is so sexy outer space would be required.
4. Kelly Rowland
Now, this is just a bad chick. The former Destiny’s Child star is less famous than Beyoncé — as is everybody on Earth, really — but not an iota less fine. Fantasy trip with Rowland: Retreat to the desert for backpacking and sleeping, cuddling under the stars. Now doesn’t that sound nice?
5. Idina Menzel
The Broadway and Disney star has stolen the hearts of many little girls with her voice and beauty — and at the same time, cemented her place as every Jewish man’s dream woman. She is so hot, I would visit a war zone to get away with her. No, but seriously, to torture that metaphor a bit more: Fly to Tel Aviv for its amazing Mediterranean food, beaches and partying with this brunette until daybreak. Amazing.
Noah Zuss is a reporter for TheBlot Magazine.